Barusan gw baca article yg d best bgt tentang relationship dari websitenya Dewa.
Eum...gw bilang keren karena stiap kalimatnya sangat meaningful bwat gw dan ngejawab banyak hal yg slama ini sering gw pertanyakan kalo udah ngomongin hubungan asmara gw!
*ciyeelahh ahirnya bocor jg nih yaa..hahaa!
Apalagi honestly udah setahun ini gw bener-bener digoncang dalam hal percintaan
(astaga bahasa gw! haha)
mungkin karna gw yg kadang unpredictable bwat sbagian cowo jadi banyak hal yg terjadi yg menyangkut "kedekatan" gw sama beberapa cowo yg pernah singgah yang ujungnya slalu berakhir dengan ketidakpastian..halahh! (ude kaya mo merit aja yg gw ngmngnya!hihihi)
sbenernya gk gitu...cuma yiaah..you know gw manusia biasa..dan gw masih muda juga..So, gw pastinya bisa 'salah' juga dalam memilih dan mnjalin hub dgn pria. hehe
aneh jg yaa knapa gw bs sring 'salah' mnilai pria?! padahal kayanya temen-temen gw slalu bilang kalo gw tuh terlalu pemilih! terlalu perfeksionis! terlalu menutup diri dan ngebingungin maunya apa..!
*well, itu klo kata mereka! biarkanlaahh orang bebas menjudge saya :)
tapi ini pilihan hidup gw..dan this is me! no one else knows what's goin on..*
bukannya gw belagu ato gmana yaa tp gw cuma ngejalanin apa yg mnurut gw bener aja..apa yg udh jadi prinsip gw sejak awal, dan sbisa mungkin gw harus bertanggungjawab sama prinsip gw..walopun resikonya orang bakalan berasumsi macem-macem tentang gw.
jujur gw tipe orang yg agak traumatis..apalagi klo udh berkaitan dengan yg namanya 'pria' ! hahah!
makanya itu gw gk gampang bwat nyari rebound d saat gw udh break dgn seseorang..krn mnurut gw that's not such a solution to cure my heartache..it's gonna be so much harder to believe in another person in the same time when i'm still hurt with the previous one..susah bwat percaya lagi! It's a shame in way,cause at that time i felt that i may not ever find the right one for me..then, gw jd ignorance bgt krn pd ahirnya scara gk langsung gw ngebedabedain orang itu dgn yg sbelumnya..till' i figured out that the previous one was always better! (actually, i was completely wrong in this case!)
I was just scared and felt like i was falling when i left him ..I can't keep going through life..unaware of what i'm missing or the person that i could be.
Yang ada dalam pikiran gw adalah "Will my love ever be?Why would i go on a search again when i know what the end will be. What good is love when it keeps on hurting me?
So, I made a promise never to settle,why didn't i keep it?Cause i hated the heartbreak, crying and cheating,the fooling around...
(sounds so hopeless right?! hehe yeaahh memang saya terkadang terlalu traumatis kalo udah pake yg namanya perasaan .hoho!)
But for many reasons..
unfortunately gw yg slalu berawal dengan kata "buat lucu-lucuan aja" berujung juga pada kata "main hati" ..and so on...(but here i go,hurt AGAIN cause of my curiosity!)
*eniwey, we started out saying that we would just be friends..but special feelings have arrisen*
Duh asli jadi mau ngakak gw kalo diinget-inget satu persatu dari mereka, dengan caranya masing-masing berhasil juga meluluhkan seorang gw yg selalu keras kepala, galak, ceroboh, bawel, brantakan, susah dingertiin, moody-an, slalu berfikir simple, jarang menunjukan sisi keperempuanannya(loh kok?!), ..pokonya ribet deh kalo kt mreka bwat take my heart itu..(ehehe iya dong it's not that easy kali!)
makanya ujung2nya mreka pada bingung sndiri klo nyari alasan 'knapa bisa naksir sama gw' ahahaa gak pake pelet yg pasti!!
The point is smua pria yg pernah "deket" sama gw dan sempet "dalem" sama gw adalah seriously not the right guy for me! *that was bcause i lost my sense of wrong and right...*
maybe at that time he's just the "right" one for me in the "right" time ..so it's matter of the time actually!
I mean he's just the right one for another girl outside..not me!
But I'm not blaming those men ..the fault is on me!
Love's good when it's right.
Bad, when it's left in your memory..all the times, and anytime.
I guess love would be nice for someone else's life.
But this time is different i must be goin' because I got life to do!
I know i'm usually hanging on, I used to hate to see him gone sometimes..
oLraiit..cukup buka-bukaannya..terlalu melanggar privasi nih lamalamaa! haha
dibawah ini adalah article yg tadi gw bilang sangat inspiring beserta opini gw perkalimatnya !!hehe
If a man wants you, nothing can keep him away. If he doesn’t want you, nothing can make him stay!
(ahhh..gk semuanya juga sih begitu..hari gini kan rada susah nyari laki yg faithful krn sekarang bukan jamannya seorang cowo bisa nrima cewenya dengan 'apa adanya' lagi tapi karena 'ada apanya'..hahah!)
Stop making excuses for a man and his behavior.
(SETUJU banget sama kalimat ini! some people said that Love is Blind but I am NOT that Blind enough buat ngebedain mana yg 'pantes' dan mana yg emang 'bisa' ditrima...karena kbyakan orang-orang slalu ngeles dengan alasan 'kan cinta itu buta' padahal orang itu tau kalo sbenernya they are not meant to be!)
Allow your intuition (or spirit) to save you from heartache.
Stop trying to change yourself for a relationship that’s not meant to be.
(as i already said..kalo emang udah tau hubungan itu mengarah ke arah yg gak jelas..just try to listen the voice within! kalo udah ngerasa gk sejalan lagi yaa mending cepet-cepet diakhirin karena kalo dibiarin aja atau kalo kata anak jaman sekarang 'with the flow aja..' malah makin 'sakit' dan meninggalkan makin parah 'luka'nya..)
Slower is better. Never live your life for a man before you find
what makes you truly happy.
(terkadang kita perlu menghargai yang namanya 'proses'.. sgala sesuatu yg instant gak akan pernah lebih baik daripada yg membutuhkan proses..Hey, the best is yet to come! daripada pacaran melulu, putus melulu, sakit hati melulu..kan lebih enak sedikit nunggu tapi hasilnya gak bikin trauma! hehehe)
If a relationship ends because the man was not treating you as you deserve then heck no, you can’t “be friends”. A friend wouldn’t mistreat a friend.
(betul sekali! emang gak boleh suujon sama orang..tapi untuk hal ini kita perlu 'waspada' juga oleh tipu muslihat seseorang..kadang dengan alasan 'pengen jaga hubungan baik' orang itu malah menyalahgunakannya..so, just over it deh sama orang yg udh jelas-jelas enggak banget!)
Don’t settle. If you feel like he is stringing you along, then he
probably is.
(yep! jangan sampe deh stuck on him kalo udah ngerasa hidup kita dikuasain banget sama orang itu! ihh..emang situ ok!? ahaha.. we have our own life to go on guys! bapak kita bukan bodyguard kita bukan udeh braninya semena-mena sama hidup kita wuoo kelaut aje!! haha)
Don’t stay because you think “it will get better.” You’ll be mad at yourself a year later for staying when things are not better.
The only person you can control in a relationship is you.
Avoid men who’ve got a bunch of children by a bunch of different women. He didn’t marry them when he got them pregnant, why would he treat you any differently?
(ahahaa yaiyaalah kalo yg ini mah udah bener-bener gak usah mikir lagi..kalo gw pribadi sih ilfil sejadijadinya yaa.hehe gamau dapet yg 'second' udah gitu 'package' pula! apapun alasannya kalo seorang suami udah ninggalin istrinya udah pasti hidupnya gk bakalan bener..jangan percaya apapun janji-janji palsunya!)
Always have your own set of friends separate from his.
Maintain boundaries in how a guy treats you. If something bothers you, speak up.
Never let a man know everything. He will use it against you later.You cannot change a man’s behavior. Change comes from within.
(agak ribet juga sih..tapi yg pasti there is always a 'girl stuff' to keep..kita masih punya kehidupan diluar dari semua tentang 'kita dan cowo kita' , kita slalu perlu sahabat disekitar kita buat 'ngejagain' kita disaat mata kita udah ketutup sama cinta dari cowo kita! hehe..dan yg paling penting jadi cewe itu harus punya prinsip yg artinya harus punya batesan-batesan sendiri yg bisa bikin cowonya gak 'bebas' buat nge-treat cewenya..jadi cewe MAHAL bukan berarti sombong loh! )
Don’t EVER make him feel he is more important than you are… even if he has more education or in a better job. Do not make him into a quasi-god. He is a man, nothing more nothing less.
Never let a man define who you are.
(great words! hehe sebagai seorang the real independent woman gw mau menghimbau buat para wanita untuk BANGKIT ,skr udah jamannya emansipasi wanita! ga ada lagi tuh yg namanya 'wanita dijajah pria atau wanita posisinya selalu berada dibawah pria' ! walopun pria itu berasal dari kelas yang brada diatas kita yaa so what?! toh derajat kita sama.. seseorang kan bukan dinilai dari apa yg dia punya tapi terlebih karena apa yg udah dia berikan, apakah dia bisa bermakna buat hidupnya dan oranglain atau enggak. pokonya yg pasti woman are special no matter what..hehe hidup wanita!)
Never borrow someone else’s man. If he cheated with you, he’ll
cheat on you.
(buat gw sih NO MORE COMPROMISE FOR CHEATING apapun alasannya..hehe)
A man will only treat you the way you ALLOW him to treat you.
All men are NOT dogs.
(eum..a bit sarcastic i think but it's ok..bener kok gw juga mengakui ada kalanya kita sebagai perempuan 'manja' sesuka kita menuntut pria ini-itu tanpa menyadari kalo smua ada feedbacknya... ehehe so, don't treat a man like he is 'my good boy' ! got it?!)
You should not be the one doing all the bending…compromise is two way street.
(well, just try not to be compromised whatever it takes..just be simple!)
You need time to heal between relationships. ..there is nothing
cute about baggage… deal with your issues before pursuing a new relationship.
(haha LIKE THIS! i told you REBOUND ID NOT SUCH A SOLUTION right?! just take your time... semuanya butuh waktu..jangan mau jatuh dilubang yg sama lagi kalo kita belum bisa belajar dari kesalahan kita yg dulu, karena life is just about moving on bukan berarti kita harus move on dengan the other person dong! just grow up and make your own time to get ready for the newcomer .hehe!)
You should never look for someone to COMPLETE you… a relationship consists of two WHOLE individuals. Look for someone complimentary, not supplementary.
(wahh..kosakata baru nih buat kamus kehidupan gw hahaa keren-keren..complimentary not supplementary! great idea! well, kbanyakan orang-orang yg udah putus klo ditanya pasti alasannya gara-gara 'gak cocok'.. padahal mah waktu dulu lagi asik-asiknya pacaran kalo ditanya "kok bisa pacaran sih kan kalian beda?" pasti jawabnya "kan kita saling melengkapi" ahahaha peres banget dah ah!)
Dating is fun…even if he doesn’t turn out to be Mr. Right.
Make him miss you sometimes… when a man always know where you are, and you’re always readily available to him – he takes it for granted.
(haha makanya itu gw udah gak mau lagi sama yang namanya 'lucu-lucuan' ! cape ah main main terus! sekarang yg serius-serius aja .hehe kalo emang dari awal doi bukan Mr.Right yah udah gak usah buka 'celah' lagi..)
Never move into his mother’s house. Never co-sign for a man. Don’t fully commit to a man who doesn’t give you everything that you need.
(hey pria bukannya kami matre yaa tapi kalo emang kalian yang ngakunya seorang pria sejati tapi gak bisa 'kerja' yaah gak usah berani-beraninya bilang serius sama cewe dong..apalagi ngajakin kawin! wihh..walopun cowo itu anak orang kaya skalipun kalo gw sih gak bakalan mau diajakin kawin trus disuru tinggal dirumah orangtuanya karena dia masih bergantung sama orangtuanya..could we say he is a real man ?! jadi pria itu harus bertanggung jawab bukan berarti dia harus tajir! hidup gak cuma bermodalkan cinta bung! kalo yg namanya 'cinta' itu bisa kasih makan kita dan anak-anak kita sih bisa aja..tapi kan impossible! kalo ada orang yg bilang "gpp..aku rela walopun harus makan sepiring berdua yang penting sama kamu" haha kalo gw mah ogah! mana kenyang makan sepiring berdua?! hihi.secara porsi makan gw kan kaya kuli! ahahaha..)
Keep him in your radar but get to know others.
(penting tuh buat wanita-wanita manja diluar sana yg suka lebay pengennya nempel mulu sama cowonya brasa hidup milik berdua, yg kadang suka overprotective juga kudu laporan sama pacarnya tiap detik dan tiap menit harus sms ato telepon ngabarin, gak boleh ini gak boleh itu...huahh lo mau jadi pacar gw ato satpam gw sih?! hahaa)
Share this with other women and men (just so they know)… You’ll make someone smile, another rethink her choices, and another woman prepare.
They say it takes a minute to find a special person,
an hour to appreciate them,
a day to love them and an entire lifetime to
forget them...
